August 11, 2016 The Vatican (You know, the one in Rome!)
At 9:00am this morning, the Pope announced that he was making it a Mortal Sin to eat spaghetti. 5 minutes later at 9:05am Italy declared war on the Holy Father. When asked if nuclear weapons would be used the Pontiff declared, “At this point nothing is off the table! I’m gonna teach those dirty Dagos not to mess with the Mac Daddy of the Vatican! I’m gonna open up a can on ’em – a can of Whupass!”
August 10, 2016 Washington D.C.
Yesterday Monica Lewinski told the New York Times that Bill Clinton was lousy in bed. She said Hillary was much better.